Vizsla Flashback - Drunk Texts from Batman

We've all been there, so this is in no way about judging.

However, reports have come to light that it is not just we, the every-dog on the street who are susceptible to sending an ill advised text message after having a couple of drinks*.  According to reliable sources, no less than Batman himself falls into that very trap on a regular basis.

*Seriously, why is there no app to lock texting if it detects that you're drunk?

Thank You, Internet, for making it possible to find a picture of just about anything

Consider the following examples of...

 Drunk Texts From Batman

Names listed as they appear in the BatCel

You can occasionally tell what Batman has been drinking just from the mood of the text.  For example, Tequila clearly makes him mean...

Batman- 

 Hey AL, get here quik, i ned your help burying a prostitute.

....?  - 

ButlerNumeroUno 

Batman-  

HA!!  You totaley fell for that didnt you DUMBASS!  LMBAO!

Shall I take it that you require the services of a taxi to return home this evening sir? - ButlerNumeroUno

Batman-  

You shud have seen ur face!!

You can't see my face, sir.  We're miles away from each other -  

ButlerNumeroUno

Batman-  

Shut up and send me a fukin taco.

I'm on my way -  

ButlerNumeroUno

Whereas you can always tell that he's been drinking bourbon when he becomes inappropriately sentimental...

Batman-  

U kno, u r totally the best.  Serriously.  U're Awesome man

Um... Thanks.  Where are you? -  

Boy, (Wonder)

Batman-  

No, reelly.  I totalley love u man.  Totalley.

Maybe we should be done crimefighting for the night... -  

Boy, (Wonder)

Batman-  

Reely.  Im gunna tell everybody man.  I totalley love U.  I'm gonna tellevrybody.

My nam is Bruce.  And I luv Dick!

Please tell me you're not driving. -  

Boy, (Wonder)

In contrast, a beer-drunk Batman appears to just get a little silly.

Batman-  

knok knock

Who is this? -  

E. Nigma

Batman-  

No, u r supposd to say who's there.  Illtryit agan.  knock knock

 Who gave you this number?-  

E. Nigma

Batman-  

Ur not doin it rite!  Knock knok!!!!

<sigh>  Fine.  Who's there.-

E. Nigma

Batman-  

I'm bateman, bitsh!

 You're Jason Bateman?-  

E. Nigma

Batman-  

Nooo!!!  Batmaan!!  Geez.

 You do realize you just totally gave me your phone number-  

E. Nigma

And Gin... well...

.

Batman-  

Hey baby.  Check THIS out...

Oh My God, is that a picture of your... Oh for Christ sake.  Seriously?????-  

 PrettyKitty

Seriously.  Maybe he should have just stuck with the Batsignal.

Until next time.  Same Bat Time, Same Bat Texts.

-Vizsla Out