Yeah. That.
Advent Calendar Day 8 - One from the vaults-
What Vizslas know about holidays:
Now, I'll be the first to admit that Vizslas are not exactly a comprehensive source of information about human holidays.
That said, I have managed to piece together a pretty fair picture of what I think is going on:
The one with the tree
Which is celebrated with three solid days of cleaning and fighting about money - Then pie.
The one with the Ham
The
same as Treeday, except instead of fighting about money this one is
traditionally celebrated by yelling at the Vizsla for tracking in mud
The one with the turkey
Cleaning, rolling in some leaves, then sleeping in front of football.
That day we drink a lot of wine
This holiday is celebrated a lot at our house.
Seriously, this must be a REALLY important one to people.
And
while I kind of don't understand Treeday, Hamday, Turkeyday and
Wineday(s), at least their customs are readily observable for the
interested dog to note so that they might be more prepared to eat even
greater amounts of Ham/Turkey/Meatloaf the following year. (Meatloaf is
the traditional Treeday dinner. Don't know why. Possibly in memory of
Saint Meat. Or possible Saint Loaf.)
Then there are the smaller less-about-giving-people-food-to-the-vizlsa holidays.
There
are things called 'birthday's which even we dog-kind get to celebrate.
The border healer just had his first one the other day and as a
celebration we were all given several chicken flavor carvers, which are
(barring ham) just about the best thing ever. People generally receive
cards and gifts on their 'birthday's but in that dogs generally don't
read or need stuff, I'm happier with our traditions
Then
there are some holidays that people celebrate by nothing more than just
not getting out of bed in the morning (Something that I choose to view
as an oblique tribute to vizslas, as we totally ROCK at not getting out
of bed) There's something called presidents day, which seems to
commemorate a sale. And 4th of July, which I personally am not a fan of
because everything becomes chemically unstable and liable to explode as
the day goes on, and if you bark to daddy to point this out he gets
irritable.
But this most mysterious of all the just-stay-in-bed holidays is this thing called 'Sickday'
So
far all I've managed to piece together about it is that one
traditionally begins the celebrations with a congratulatory phonecall to
one's employer, commemorating the occasion. (so it's possibly
something to do with secretaries day..?) And then either laying down on
the bed or the couch, whereupon one watches lots and lots of Doctor Who.
As
holiday's go, it's pretty low key, but I do have to mention that the
traditional sick day meal (Chicken noodle soup out of a can heated in
the microwave and ginger ale on ice) SUCKS when compared to Hamday or
Turkeyday meals.
And get this - No one even comes by with a card or gifts!
I know, right?
And
attempting to pep up the Sickday celebrations with a little tug the
rope or ballplay (easy there shriner!) is NOT looked upon favorably.
Also,
this being a holiday, I think it's reasonable to assume that there was
some pleasantly non-offensive pagan holiday on the date and the early
christian church co-opted it with their feast day to Saint Sick because
it was easier to just pretend that everybody was celebrating their
holiday instead of going to all the effort of creating something
positive or productive of their own. But I'm really just playing the
odds there.
I still say there should be cards and gifts though
Vizsla out
