Wednesday, July 10, 2013

You're Awesome, Christopher Lee. Please don't kill me.

First of all it should be acknowledged that he is properly called Sir Christopher Lee.  He was knighted in 2009.

Secondly it should also be acknowledged that he probably killed Nazis with his bare hands in World War II.*

*He was part of something sinisterly titled the 'Special Operations Executive' during the War and is still forbidden to speak about anything that he might have actually done.  It should however be noted that on at least one occasion during the filming of Lord of the Rings he actually stopped director Peter Jackson in order to correct him on precisely what it sounds like when you stab a man through the ribcage from behind.  Just take a moment with that.

Outside of the knighting and stabbing portions of his resume (Or c.v. if you're European) some other fun facts to know about Sir Christopher include

-He's Step Cousins with Ian Fleming (creator of James Bond)

-He can claim to have been personal friends with J.J.R. Tolkien

-In 2010 he recorded a heavy metal album about Charlemagne at the age of 88.  You know, like one does.

-He's the only person on the planet to have been main villains in Dracula, James Bond, Lord of the
Rings, and Star Wars.  I'm fairly certain that if he secures a role as lead villain in J.J. Abrams next Star Trek movie that he will officially own us all.

-In addition to being fluent in French and German, he also spent a little time in college studying Latin and Ancient Greek.  The way we all did.  If by 'Studying Latin and Ancient Greek' you meant 'Drinking a lot of cheap beer.'

-His urine can cure Cancer.  (I'm just guessing on this one, but based on the previous entries it seems like a safe bet)

-Oh, and he's also 6'5".  Just in case he wasn't sufficiently intimidating.

All of which is a lengthy way of saying that as amazingly cool as it would be to meet Sir Christopher, under no circumstances should you do so alone or at night.



When he says 'I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you', he is NOT joking.
 


 

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