Google Provides Yet Another Reason to Feel Bad about Ourselves as a Culture

So apparently someone has taken the time to look up what the most common Google Search request is in each of these, our 50 States of the Union.  (That would be the USA for the foreign readership.  FYI - prepare to feel culturally superior.  At least until someone looks up your nations most common search criteria.)

The US map with what each state looks for most on the Internet can be found here.

Now, first off - I live in Minnesota.  Where apparently we do a lot of Internet searching for 'Roller Blading'

The only explanation that immediately leaps top mind for this is that the bulk of Minnesota's search engine usage can be found in and around the Uptown area, and we can safely assume that the #2 most searched for item is 'Axe Body Spray'*

*Footnote for the not locals - that was funny as Hell.

The data seems to fall into a few general categories.

The first category - 'I totally would have guessed that'

Witness, for example, New Mexico and their online search for UFOs.  Totally makes sense.  I suspect you can probably mapqwest area 51 as well if you have the patience to try.  Similarly, Nevada's entry - 'Tattoo Removal'.  For when you're really anxious for something that happened in Vegas to stay in Vegas.  Then we see Alaska - Whose entry of 'Mail Order Brides' is only screaming out for a font that reads as slightly more desperate in order to be exactly what we were expecting to see there.

Then we look to Alabama and Mississippi, who are searching for Twerking and God.

This kind of feels right to me, since I'm not 100% sure which is Alabama and which is Mississippi* and frankly the concepts of Twerking and God are equally a waste of time as far as I can see.  Plus both make you look ridiculous on Youtube.

*Vizlsas- Not awesome with geography.  But hey, at least I can admit it.

Then we have the category of 'Public Shame'.  I can only imagine the taunting that takes place on the state line between Montana and South Dakota.

'You guys search for Meth!'

'Well at least it isn't Nickleback!'

(Note - I am unable to determine who's argument is sadder in this instance...)

Similarly, the 'sad-off' border dispute between Virginia and Kentucky.  Farmville v. Whitesnake.  You know, they're natural enemies in the wild.

But no one... NO ONE is sadder than Missouri... An entire state searching for The Family Circus.  Seriously... as a people they have become so despondent that they can't even be bothered Googling a cartoon that doesn't suck.  This is what a cry for help looks like people.  Right.  There.

The less said about Texas' 'Do I have Herpes' the better, beyond pointing out that this is yet another solid reason to not put up to much efforts into their push to secede...

Then there is the category of 'More information needed'

Why is Louisiana spending so much time googling The Golden Girls?  I mean, I kind of approve, but I'm bewildered by it.  Um... Washington...? WT comprehensive F??  Iowa- please tell me you're looking for the college and not the shitty musician.  Illinois, what are you thinki... ok, never mind, I'm not really surprised by that one.  Pennsylvania.  What about the topic needs further research on your part?  What more can there be to know about it??  Massachusetts - I see what you're doing there.

So, there it is.  Take some time to look at what we're looking at