Thursday, May 8, 2014

Holy Crap, Brave Little Toaster!

If you're like me, you occasionally find yourself thinking, 'Self, why aren't there quicker ways to emotionally damage children?'*

*Not that I would ever think that...

Well, if you've ever thought that then you've clearly never seen Disney's The Brave Little Toaster.  Also you might be a sociopath.

Why, as recently as this morning I counted myself amongst that happy number.  Sadly, my eyes have been opened now.

I refer specifically to... The Clown Dream Sequence.

I'll wait a moment for your shaking to stop.


OK, I'll wait a bit longer.  Maybe you should step outside for a breath of fresh air, or a smoke or something.  You know, if you smoke.  I wouldn't encourage anyone to start smoking as a result of the Clown Dream Sequence, although God knows I'd understand.  I mean, did you SEE that thing??

The obvious comment here is HOLY SHIT!!!!!  And then strenuous attempts to claw your own eyes out.

Now, I'm not sure at what point Disney decided that they hated children, put clearly it was at some point before they storyboarded the giant smoke-demon hand turning into psychotic fireman clown.*

*Not a sentence you can work into every conversation.

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