Tuesday, August 27, 2013

TV is so much more fun this way

The other day I saw a post on Facebook which mentioned that the best possible ending for the show Breaking Bad would be for Walter to go into the witness protection plan and get assigned to the family from Malcolm in Middle, which would then be where that show began.

While we take a moment with the unrivaled awesome of that idea, I would humbly suggest that ALL TV characters played by the same Actor should be viewed as the same character - regardless of the many ridiculous mutually exclusive details of said characters.

For Example - Who wouldn't watch a show about a Young Witch who - despairing over a breakup with her new and not as interesting lesbian lover after averting yet another Apocalypse - Casts a memory spell on herself and takes up with a specially created Sex-Robot who thinks he's a Lawyer and their wacky friends in NYC?  (Note:  How I Met Your Mother is much more interesting if you take this as the premise.  Particularly if you wrap movies into it and have to reconcile why S.H.I.E.L.D. has one of their top agents infiltrating the gang)

But watch out...

Because Rogue Demon Hunter Wesley Wyndam-Price - killed by Cyrus Grail, had his body appropriated by the Dollhouse Corporation and after an unsuccessful attempt at making him a congressman now have him infiltrating Agent Maria's confidences as occasional Dalliance-Partner, News Man Sandy Rivers!

Or what of Holland Manners?  

After being killed by his Arch-Foe Angel, the Senior Partners chose to punish him by exiling him to a poorly explained Island-Hell-Dimension, where he was stranded by a plane crash and separated from his newly assembled wife/construct?  Plus whatever the Hell else Sam Anderson got up to on Justified, Hawaii 5-0, Criminal Minds and like 40 other things.  Seriously, the guy's been on freakin' everything.

And Canton Everett Delaware III! 

Denied the ability to Marry his true love in the Nixon era, he sold his soul to the devil, eventually becoming King of the Crossroad Demons and then King of Hell?  Who can Chronicle his many faces and adventures* - all that is known is that he ends up in the far future working under the name of Badger.

*I certainly can't.  Because again, Mark Sheppard has been on every TV show known to mankind.  I'm not kidding.  IMDB him.

And how about that time that Maude made her stupid best friend into a Ho', at the same time turning Mary Tyler Moore's Sue-Ann Nivens into a complete moron - All as some sort of horrifying Florida-Based Eugenics Experiment?  

Once we get into the British shows things get a little trickier as there are really only 6 character actors working in Britain since 1960.   Fortunately, they've pretty much all been on Doctor Who - so you can use that to iron out most of the kinks in their timelines.

I'm telling you - TV gets so much weirder, so much scarier, and so much better, when you put a little effort into it.

No comments:

Post a Comment