Tuesday, June 4, 2013

The Case for Granting Henry Rollins Timelord technology

There are many legitimate examples in the world of people who would benefit from having 5 different versions of themselves plucked from their relative timestreams and placed together for the purposes of a nostalgic misadventure.  Bowie of course is usually the first name thrown out.  Althouth quite frankly, at least three of the 5 Bowies would probably be too coked out of their mind to really be able to settle down and fight Cybermen.

People usually then go to Madonna as the fallback position; mostly because she exists as a sort of Bowie-Lite when it comes to self re-identification through outfits.  I think really people just want to see chunky jewelery Madonna and Cone Tits Madonna slapping the crap out of each other.

<Take a moment to savor that mental image...>

But I'm here to tell you that both of those are false leads.

When it comes down to frivolous adaptation of time technology as applied to pop cultural figures (Am I the only one that suddenly really wants to write a thesis with that title?) There is but one clear answer.

Henry Freakin' Rollins
Beware... his gaze renders lesser men sterile.

Imagine, if you will, a timescoop swooping out of nowhere, relentlessly gathering-  

Black Flag Henry Rollins
Focal point of anger and rage that is actually capable of articulating exactly why it's angry.
 Which is less common than you would think
Rollins band Henry Rollins
Whereas Black Flag Henry Rollins was a focal point of rage in a larger collective,
Rollins Band Henry Rollins WAS rage as embodied by Henry Rollins.
Which is an important distinction

And this is as good a time as any to link to the video for Liar, because it's one of the best things ever

Writer/Journalist and owner of 2.13.61 publishing Rollins
2/13/61 is his birthday (that's 13/2/61 if you are Europe) Hence the name
A more reflective Rollins, sending his well articulated thoughts out to a larger community than might be reached by the DC hard core punk scene.

Spoken Word Artist Rollins
If you've never heard any of Henry Rollins spoken word pieces, you should stop reading this immediately and go buy them on CD.  I defy anyone to listen to them and - even if you disagree with him - make a legitimate claim that he hasn't made a reasoned, articulate, and compelling case for whatever he's talking about at the time.

Post performance activist and spokesman Rollins
One thing that is easy to overlook in the first few Rollins' - He's very funny.
And never moreso than these days as he speaks out for a few issues that he feels strongly about.
Do yourself a favor and enter his name in a youtube search and just spend a pleasant afternoon listening to him

Seriously, Time Lords.  Get on this.  And don't use that 'Oh we're all dead' thing as an excuse.

P.S. - I didn't even mention actor Henry Rollins.  Is it too late to start petitioning for him to be the 12th Doctor?

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