Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Ah Marky Mark, we meet again. But this time we - the Funky Bunch- will have our revenge!


Yes Marky Mark.  Your eyes do not deceive you.  It is we - your arch nemeses - The Funky Bunch.  And this time the advantage is ours!

Please, by all means, struggle against your carbon monofiliment reinforced excrutio-bonds.  We can assure you - there is no chance you will escape this time!

Scream all you like, you petty fool.  Scream like we did when Music For the People made it to #21 on the Billboard 200.  Oh, but how the memory of those happy times leaves naught but the unquenchable bittersweet thirst for vengeance in these, our vicious funky throats. 

Feel the 'Good Vibrations' now, Mr. Mark!  Feel how they buuurrrrrrn.

I hope you don't mind us pointing this enormous death laser at your glistening shirtless torso...  Oh yes Marky, we know that you've forgotten your shirtless roots, but we- those of us faithful to the old ways - we shall never forgot nor prove unfaithful!

You really thought you could escape us, didn't you.  HA!  We say again HA HA!

In fact, MWA HAHAHAHAHA!  You cannot begin to imagine the infinite depths of our Funky Bunch Powers!  For we have not lain dormant, waning in our memories of that brief reunion period between December of 2007 and August of 2008!  We SAY NO!

Oh... but what is that you can see above you... could it be... you see the silhouette of The FunkyCopter?  Could you possibly be such fool that you dream of escaping these shackles and somehow making your escape.  WE DEFY YOU MARKY MARK!

The Funky Copter has but been left there for you to experience the exquisite agony of a moment of hope - much like we felt when our song "I want you" was featured on the Super Mario Brothers movie soundtrack. - so that it sears you inside when we take that hope and crush it without mercy.


What???  You fools!!! Who didn't check his secret boot compartment!!  It was totally you, wasn't it Scottie G!!!  After him you fools!!  Use the death ray powers of our universally panned video game - Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch: Make My Video, truly only it's awesome powers of suckiness can bring Marky Mark to his final doooooooooommmmm!!!

Oh Crap.  Hector, you totally left the keys in the FunkyCopter, didn't you.

DAMN YOU MARKY MARK!!!  You win this round.  But know this!  The Funky Bunch.... Will... Be... Waiting!!!!


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